It's not so much that I'm hungry as that I miss food. My stomach is definitely empty, but I'm not going through the "must eat right this instant" sensations. No, I've been thinking about the Christmas candy around the apartment, and the heat and texture of things like hamburgers.
This afternoon I went for a couple mile walk on the treadmill. 2.03 miles over 35 minutes, nothing strenuous. But it built up a LITTLE sweat and got my blood flowing... apparently it helps flush the lymphatic system. Who knows.
I've really been pondering why I'm even doing this. At the same time, I'm wondering whether those are just thoughts that are part of the withdrawal from food. I've been trying to pray or thinking about prayer with varying levels of success. I'm not the most spiritual person to begin with, even if I have spent a lot of time traveling around charismatic circles. I guess I'm a bit goofed up.
I'm not feeling much motivation to keep going, but hopefully I'll find it. I'm going to aim for a week at the very least. If I go 40, great. Otherwise, I'm not going to sweat it.
I'm wondering if it will be easier when the other guys start up and I"m not the only one doing it. Maybe, having started ahead of them, I'll be able to be an encouragement as they go through 'withdrawals'(?).
I guess I've always been about extremes. When I did my first bicycle century, I'd never ridden more than 30 miles. When I did the Ironman, I'd never done a triathlon and the farthest I'd ever run in training was in the upper teens... and I'd never run a regular marathon.
With this, before the past couple of weeks, I'd never really fasted more than a meal. I'm not sure what made me think that I could do forty days. I guess we'll see.
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God never gives us more than our capacity. I am finding that out in my life and its a strain. But I believe in the end I will be stronger for it.
Fasting is a long row to hoe. Especially alone. One day seems a long time when your just counting down to when you used to eat and now are not.
The first few days or week are the hardest. Then it improves physically as well as mentally until you hit that wall.
After you have completed your fast take three days to bring more complex foods back into your life. Broths and salads work great.
Grabbing gummi bears and chocolate will make it so much worse.
Stay strong for now and it will get better.
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