Creative Bankruptcy and Mental Application

Hey everybody, try to get through the first part of this if you can because even though it doesn't seem to be multi-sport related, everything ties together at the end.

I've got a term for when I'm stalled on a project. I say, in those times, that I'm Creatively Bankrupt. I think one of the keys in design and writing and even sport is to find a way to perform despite the creative bankruptcy.

I like the thought of creative bankruptcy more than say, Writer's block. To me, writers block really doesn't tell you anything. When I picture writer's block there's almost an image that pops into my head of a brooklyn street block in summer with the humidity in the air causing the inhabitants to swim to their cars and stoops. Somewhere above all of it, with the window cracked and World War II era desk fan tepidly blowing air into the stagnating room sits a stringy man in BVDs and a wifebeater typing with two fingers onto an empty white sheet. Ok, maybe that was a bit too descriptive. Scratch the man, the fan, the humidity and the people and just open up the scene on a fall day with the camera rising up from a low shot of the street to the street sign, which oddly enough says, "Writer's block?".

Creative bankruptcy, on the other hand strikes me as more visceral. I remember the first time I heard the word visceral. I was in high school and my friend Lance had made me a cassette copy of an album called Fathom by Mortal. I'd never heard industrial music before. Somehow, the combination of metal guitars and dance beats was infectious. I think the music was something I needed at the time. I was an angry kid and they let me be angry but have some hope in the anger.

Anyway, back to visceral. The first track on fathom is called Alive and Awake.

We walk the walls in this freak of flesh
Along the twists of our visceral mesh
Against the powerflow of motionless flood
It's an experience of flesh and blood

I face the wave of this gravity
I face the Beauty in the things I can't see
I face the Weakness that has rendered me strong
I face the fate of my existence head on

Ready to Bleed
Ready to Feel
Ready to Love
Without fear

I, I'm alive, am Alive, I'm alive and Awake!

I pray for wisdom in the days of my Youth
I pray for courage in the presence of Truth
I pray for Grace at each approach of the sun
I pray for peace and for the Kingdom to come

I walk the world in this vessel of flesh
Inside the twists of this visceral mesh
Caught in the powerflow of motionless flood
It's an experience of the flesh and the blood

For all that lives and dies
Entails a sacrifice of love
Though the earth, the surf, the skies
Are gilded with good-byes
Be sure - God is in Control

And when the dead leaves fall
For time will fail us all
Never fail to remember
The One in whom we move and breathe
And have our being
Is the God who's in Control!

How do we die?

How do we sleep?

When we're ready to be human
- without fear

I think the most humorous thing about Mortal is that one of the two guys in the band, Jerome Fontamillas, is now in semi-Christian teeny bopper alt-rock band Switchfoot. Skinny-Puppy inspired industrial music to Switchfoot, that's not something you see every day.

The first time I saw mortal was one of the first major God experiences in my life. In Minneapolis, one of the places Christian high school music geeks hung out was called The New Union (now Club 3 Degrees). I'd go hang out there whenever I could because I thought there'd be a chance to find people who actually liked me for me (a very rare thing at that point in time).

I had just gotten the Mortal tape from Lance when we found out they were coming in concert. The night of the show I was exuberantly excited. I tried to look scary, wearing my only black t-shirt (A D.C. Talk Free At Last shirt) and some dark pants (I didn't actually own any jeans at the time.)

The New Union wasn't a huge club and people were squeezed in elbow to elbow in the darkly lit room. Mortal was here! Tonight! I don't know if it was high school emotion or genuine spirituality, but it felt like amid the crunching guitars and layered distortion, the presence of the Holy Spirit entered the room. Dozens of people fell to their knees in the most pit with their hands raised while the moshing continued around them. Somehow none of us got injured.

But back to Creative Bankruptcy. That story was in ways an answer to how to deal with creative bankruptcy... free form writing. I knew I needed to write and that I wasn't feeling it. I started and things began to pour out.

Training is like that. The other day I didn't want to ride. I rode anyway because I felt I had to. Because I made the decision to ride, I was able to push through it. Long distance racing, I think, is 90% mental. You can train your body to function for 16 hours, but it takes a focused and centered mind to keep going after your body decides it would really like a couch and a beer thank you very much.

Do we spend enough time doing mental training before a race? I don't see it often addressed in the training plans I look at. Most often, the focus of these plans is to grind out the miles and drills. The programs mention that like in weight training, quality is important, but I think they need to have instruction in thought as well.

There's a really excellent book I picked up a couple years ago called Sports Psychology for Cyclists By Dr Saul Miller and Peggy Maass Hill. The book begins to address some of these specific things.

From chapter 1, Managing Mind and Emotions...

Most athletes and coaches would agree that success in their sport is at least 50% "Mental" and the result of their mind and body working well together. Indeed excellence in any sport is the result of the successful integration of physical, technical and mental factors. However, in reality this idea of integration of mind and body is under-practiced in preparing athletes for most sports, and there is a disproportional focus on the physical and technical aspects of training. Mental training is ignored.

This essay shows a good application of mental exercise. Writing and thinking to write and think. Free flowing thought got me to what is really the meat of the article and would normally be trimmed out. I'm leaving in the first part of this writing because I want to show the process.

Think of the brain in this article as warming up. By the time we get to training in the article, my body has decided that what it's actually thinking about now that the brain has booted up.

If I were riding, the first part of the article is my junk thought. "I think I locked the door. Hmm the wind is cold, maybe I should have worn heavier gloves. Blah, blah, blah." By mile three my boot up is finished and I can focus on the "programs" that later chapters of Sports Psychology for Cyclists touches on. Refer back to my first soundtrack article for some thoughts on a couple of the brain programs I use.

I don't know all of the mental training exercises I'd recommend, but I think that journalling/blogging is high up in the list. Talking in written words about your training is a bit like the football team watching film analysis. It's a way for the brain to look at what went right and wrong. If you spend enough time doing it, hopefully your brain will get a boost from a program that enforces the good actions and general cognizance from training the brain to be analytical. If the brain gets good at analysis while you're writing, hopefully it will translate to making real time analysis on the course.

I'll think about more mental exercises and write them up as they come to me.

Other articles that might be a bit of a help
Mental Focus for the Ironman by Rich Strauss
Tapering for Ironman: 12 Tips
Mental Training Part 2: Concentration

I like this paragraph from the Mental Training Part 2 article...

Practice switching focus

The good news is that a great deal of these skills are practiced everyday in training: while swimming you need to be aware of the other swimmers in your lane, on the bike and run you are constantly aware of vehicles, stop signs, traffic lights and changes in road conditions. Trying to get meaningful training in while facing these distractions will help hone your ability to switch between narrow and broad focus. However, there are drills you can do in order to help improve these skills even further. The first is to read while sitting in front of the television (this works best if you are not especially interested in the reading material but you are interested in the show) and read for as long as you can without becoming distracted. After reading a given amount, maybe a page, switch your focus to the television show for a minute and then go back to reading. Once you become proficient at this, you can up the stakes by reading smaller amounts (paragraphs or even sentences), watch T.V. for a few seconds and then try to go back to reading at the exact spot you left off. Another exercise that I have found to work well with my athletes is to have them watch a sporting event (the sport is not really important but it should be something relatively fast – basketball, hockey, volleyball, etc) and have them vary focus between narrow (the athlete controlling the play) and broad (what all the athletes are doing). Although I have mainly used this to help athletes read and react to what other players are doing on the floor, it has also helped them with their ability to focus. The best thing about these drills is that they will not take you away from your family, increase your chance of injury or be cancelled due to weather conditions.

one last article and a link to more articles
Mental Toughness in Triathlon Training
Stories related to mental training